[The urge to scream at him, to tell him that he's wrong, despite every piece of evidence that's smacking him in the face, creates a horrible sense of alone-ness in the exchange. He isolates himself, like he always does, on the predication that his efforts aren't understood, that there's still stuff left inside him to keep pushing even in the face of impossible odds. Even if there was a 1% chance to save him, he'd take it.]
You don't... You don't understand- He...
[Ryuji looks down at his hands, down at the soldier who's struggling and can't make sense of the world around him, and that's...
That's when it hits. There isn't a non-zero chance of survival. His chest burns, he lets his hands pull back from his body, curl up into fists and pound against the mud until it stings so much he doesn't know what to do with them.]
This is BULLSHIT. He doesn't DESERVE this. Fuck this!!! Fuck all of this!
[Inconsolable, he starts panicking at the thought of what he knows he should do, but he can't bring himself to it. He can't play god. He can barely play himself.]
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You don't... You don't understand- He...
[Ryuji looks down at his hands, down at the soldier who's struggling and can't make sense of the world around him, and that's...
That's when it hits. There isn't a non-zero chance of survival. His chest burns, he lets his hands pull back from his body, curl up into fists and pound against the mud until it stings so much he doesn't know what to do with them.]
This is BULLSHIT. He doesn't DESERVE this. Fuck this!!! Fuck all of this!
[Inconsolable, he starts panicking at the thought of what he knows he should do, but he can't bring himself to it. He can't play god. He can barely play himself.]