WILL YOU WALK INTO MY PARLOR—

[agogemod]

WHO? Everybody!
WHAT? BASE training, between investigating the fish.
WHEN? Still outside time and space, in the aether between dimensions.
ANYTHING ELSE? Please warn for anything besides physical violence and move to a personal journal if it's beyond PG-13.

I want to wring out your evil thoughts;

I want to eat out your bitter heart

READ THE JHASHCH INFOPAGE.

OVERVIEW

A couple weeks into exploration, recruits receive a bulletin on their BCEs.

@SCOUT | @ALL

report to the foyer at 0600 hours tomorrow for a briefing; it'll be a couple weeks yet, but you're headed to jhashch, circa 382.92

you'll receive a datapack that goes over the location in detail, but we're still acquiring location-appropriate clothing. you'll receive your equipment in full before departure. until then, you've more than a little training to accomplish.

the commander will lay out your regime tomorrow. don't make her wait.

Anyone who arrives early will catch the end of an argument between Grothia, Chiron, and Young. Or, more accurately, Grothia and Young.

If you listen carefully to Grothia's raised voice and Young's collective jeer over Chiron's calm, placating tones, you'll learn Grothia and Young are required to attend this summit, in a show of good faith. And it's a matter Grothia has only addressed with your scout now. She storms from the room in a flurry of white feathers and the crows sulk for the rest of the day.

Needless to say, she is furious. She is not a fan of spiders.


THE MAIN FOYER

The foyer has been overhauled. The walls are dark and impersonal; while not terribly different from their usual steel, they're slick and clean in a way BASE is not, so polished you can see your distorted reflection. And this sterile surface is only a backdrop to architecture reminiscent of the height of the Baroque period: decadent, dark, and sometimes pointlessly opulent.

Many of the rooms are only gently lit, leaving long shadows, and sometimes you might spot movement out of the corner of your eye. It's dark and cool, almost like a cellar, but by no means even a fraction as musty. It's as well ventilated as BASE can ever be. And, while some rooms simply acclimate you to your upcoming surroundings, others serve clear purpose.

Much of the furniture is odd in shape, casting swooping silhouettes and made for creatures much larger and rounder than humans. But what is meant for human use is just as opulent, decked in rich fabrics and carved wood.

A few rooms along the foyer's rim are bright, with large "windows" (high definition screens, much like the ones in your rooms) that display the rusty landscape of Jhashch. It's possible to see various lifeforms wandering the jagged terrain, hyper realistic, though the images will loop if you watch long enough. Sometimes, you might even spot an undisguised Aranean.

Welcome to your training grounds.

TRAINING

All recruits must train extensively in each of the following categories. This is emphasized and revisited again and again, until it is drilled into memory. But this time, it isn't like the shooting and running of the Great War. This is a little more...refined.

However, it's not as easy to tell when you've messed up, so COST has repurposed some Dactly droids. Each recruit will have one droid assigned to follow them; when a mistake is made, it will hurl a glitter bomb at the person and cheerfully inform them, "You have been consumed." 🎊 The glitter is just as difficult to remove as you'd expect.


ETIQUETTE

Etiquette is split into several key elements. Recruits are repeatedly reminded: if your etiquette is poor enough, an Aranean may eat you, diplomacy and goodwill be damned. They take poor form deadly serious.

» POSTURE

Araneans see power in perfect posture, whether sitting or standing. You are always expected to be at your tallest and most intimidating, with shoulders straight back and hands placed in your lap or on your glass or cutlery. It's poor form to turn your face down or away when someone is talking to you; Araneans favor eye contact. It is advised to look at the largest, middle two eyes of an Aranean.

» CONVERSATION

Be interesting; this is no place for wallflowers. Speak with authority on topics you know or, at least, can fake. What matters is confidence, aggression, and dominating the conversation. Recruits will compile three topics that they can speak of confidently at length.

» ENTERTAINMENT

Characters should choose a skill to hone into something presentable in the Court. This can be anything, whether art, music, shooting, sword fighting, etc. Something they can show off and demonstrate, that they're sure they'll dominate in. And note: While dominance and cruelty are powerful in their own right, there's something to be said for anyone who can distract and charm another to their doom.

However, don't go in swinging your hardest. Always keep an ace up your sleeve, just in case.

» DANCE

Like most warrior cultures of the past, Araneans are obsessed with dancing as much as appearance. Their whole purpose is an intricate display of steps and motions and memorization of positions. For people with fewer than eight legs, it is mercifully a little easier.

A little. You still have to learn at least three common dances to satisfy your Dactyl droid.

» DINING

Meals are taken very seriously by Araneans, with a set order and customs that are observed almost obsessively.

• SKULGA: All meals start with a glass of alcoholic drink, chosen carefully by the hosting family. This is to ensure no drink or glass has been poisoned. As such, all meals begin with every guest skulling a glass.


• CURATH-MIR: The first person to eat is always highest in rank. To eat at the same time is to challenge them and attempt to take their place...or that of the food on their plate.


• LAMBRAT: A napkin of sorts, but one you bring to match your outfit. It is tied to the left wrist and used during the meal like a typical napkin. They are usually of very expensive and boldly colored material, which you can use to motion servants without looking at them. You don't want to break eye contact with your conversation partner.


• COLPATHA: A dish that is the first course of every banquet. It is raw meat of a choice cut and presented in a bowl over open flame on hot coals, with appropriate utensils. You have to cook the meat yourself. It is also expected to be something of a spectacle, by doing tricks with how you cook.


• CUTLERY: There are no forks here; only a series of intricate, specially curved knives. And no, you can't use your hands.

» BOWING

Spiders are prone to display. For an Aranean, bowing involves extending all limbs of their upper body and bending at the main knee of their legs, all whilst keeping the upper body stiff and face forward; after all, eye contact is still key. It's somewhat reminiscent of this little spider, though with the raised limbs spread wider, like a ballerina.

For humans, it's more difficult to execute; we have fewer limbs, after all. Instead, both men and women step forward, extend the dominant leg back, lift both arms and bend at the knees. It is, quite possibly, the most precarious balancing act you've done in a while. For men, only one arm is lifted and the other tucked behind the back. For women, well...

» DIPLOMACY

Recruits are encouraged to help each other grasp the art of backstabbing; COST understands it is a nebulous art and carefully honed with time. Better to allow the experts to educate, than to muddle along without that spark.

That said, if you encounter diplomats from other groups, you're expected to conduct yourself as you would around an Aranean...which, unfortunately, includes the Regency.


GROOMING

Araneans are obsessed with appearance, grooming, and presentation, if the etiquette wasn't enough, so it's time for COST to take a ~spa day~. At least here you won't get lice.

Another series of repurposed droids are now your hairdressers, manicurists, and personal groomers. It's nothing truly dramatic and mostly intended to get everyone up to standard, with optional courses in makeup and hair-styling for full banquets and other occasions. Hair can be styled to taste, as long as it's neat and isn't too labor intensive; recruits are expected to maintain it and the rest of their appearance afterwards.

From here on out, no one comes to breakfast or dinner without a shower, their hair done, or nails cleaned. Presenting yourself as a mess is disrespectful and will be similarly as punished.

Also, COST is far too broke to get you actual maidservants, so it's important to remember what is realistic for a single person to accomplish.


LANGUAGE

When conversing with humans, Araneans will speak in a language the BCE can translate, but names will remain as they are. Aranean custom doesn't attribute meanings to names, since so many children are born in a single clutch of eggs. But it's impossible for humans to make the sounds necessary for their language, so Araneans will tolerate screw-ups—to an extent.

There are recordings of Aranean names, pronounced by an Aranean speaker (it sounds like a series of hisses and clicks) and then the nearest approximation by a human, which is middling at best and involves a pale imitations of those sounds.

Here are some examples of what human-spoken Aranean sounds like, to give you a vague idea: Jhashch, Thsh, Chch, Shai, Aythy, Shch.

Also, you should always use a spider's title. Whether a noble lady or lord to the High Queen herself, failing to use a title is a sign of wanton disrespect...or a challenge. Either option is inadvisable when COST is trying to garner respect and curry favor with the royal court.


COMBAT

For general combat training, the gym and armory are open and available. A large mechanical spider sits in the former; Chiron has activated it for the recruits' use. Roughly the size of a male Aranean, its armor is reminiscent of Aranean plate and possesses similar weak points. The most striking of these is the abdomen and their comparatively fragile joints. The robot is unintelligent, but moves as an Aranean does, with agile leaps and viciously quick strikes.

It also fires lasers, which is less than accurate, but pay that no mind.

» DUELING

The rapiers recruits receive serve a purpose. It's time to learn renaissance-style fencing, as they are the standard dueling weapon for the Aranean people. Unlike the stamina building exercises of Gallipoli, everyone will train for agility and precision. This will cover everything from sprints, lunges, when and how to strike human and Aranean opponents, and—most useful of all—how to maintain your balance. Training lasts for three hours every morning after breakfast. It's heavy on leg and shoulder work.

It becomes very apparent why some people spend their whole lives devoted to the sword: This isn't a skill you pick up overnight. Characters who know a different style of swordwork will be better off than those who have never trained before. A poor man's weapon this is not.

Then there are the duelist courtesies and rules:

• To issue a challenge: strike your opponent lightly with an open palm across the cheek.
• To accept the duel: strike your challenger back in a similar fashion.
• To refuse the duel: bow and step backwards.

When a duel begins, the duelists will meet at an agreed time and place. After meeting in the center of the room, they will hold their weapons up with two hands, so their opponent can see no one has tampered with the weapons; after the inspection, they take three steps back while still facing each other, before turning back to their starting position.

Matches last until the first serious injury, rather than first blood. The ideal is to in some way incapacitate your opponent. The droids will be the judge of that in training; they'll shower you in glitter should you lose and cheerfully intone, "You have been grievously wounded."

At the end of a duel, both sides will bow (if able) and then be led—or carried—off the floor, holding their weapons in front of them.

» RITE OF SUCCESSION

There's also the bare-handed brawl, which is the peak of Aranean dueling. However, bare-handed brawls are matches to the death and an absolute way to settle a dispute without killing a whole family. As such, it's the usual method of succession amongst family members.

» GAMING

There are lectures on video games as fine art, famous Aranean gamers and game designers, and pioneers of different genres. But besides thorough education on common terminology, game training mostly consists of, well, playing video games. There is an entire room dedicated to the art, with multiple screens connected to consoles of all types.

The ultimate goal, in the briefest of terms, is to learn not to suck.

For veteran gamers, practice is encouraged and experience with genres you ignore in favor of your favorite titles is all but demanded. Spiders have it all, from shooters to rhythm games to role-playing to virtual reality. As long as it's got that extra bit of violent spice and has a clear winner or loser, it's all good.

So don't be a scrub and play the damn games.


FIRST AID

First aid features a crash course in toxins popular in the High Court. These are primarily neurotoxins; the most popular variety is imported from the people of the Fafnirian System and known as Drip Venom. It is almost always fatal to Araneans, but requires a higher dosage to meet the same effectiveness on humans; if you find yourself poisoned by it, you may very well survive if you administer an antidote quickly enough.

Necrotoxins are primarily used when the goal isn't to kill, but to maim. They're intended to destroy the receiver's beauty and social standing.

Characters will learn how to use the antitoxin injectors in their inventory by practicing with an empty shell and simulating injections in their thighs. The nanites contained within the injectors are powerful and will neutralize most varieties of toxins. They will at least help counter male spider bites (females can inject much higher quantities of venom, which may make a single injector relatively useless) and extremely mild Ymir poisoning.


HIERARCHY

All recruits have their place in the Aranean hierarchy and will learn to weaponize it to the best of their ability. However, since COST is lacking in Aranean senses, this training relies on the identity recruits claim for themselves (though, if needed, you can assume Grothia told them to train in a specific category; she won't have anyone jeopardize the mission).

It is also stressed that there is no guarantee that anything you do or say on Jhashch goes unobserved, whether by Araneans, their servants, or their spies. To an Aranean, everything is about power and displays of power. To be complacent is to be weak and, consequently, prey.

Using the Araneans as a guide, now might be a good time to adopt a false hierarchy you can fall into when "alone" with other COST members. In this framework, female characters of artificial origins rank at the top and male characters of magical origins sit at the bottom, but there are likely more than a few gray areas for members of COST.

But better safe than sorry. In the High Court, there is no such thing as being too paranoid, because these are apex predators who always hunt the weakest first.

READ THE JHASHCH INFOPAGE.

NAV. NETWORK LOGS OOC MEMES PLURK

Comments

John Constantine | dc | ota

[inconstantly]

GAMING

[John Constantine has always been terrible with technology. Back home he's lucky to have a phone most days as he's consistently losing it and his laptop is held together with tape. Only in the past year has he acquired a smartphone and even then barely knows how to use it. He's fine with being adept at vending machines and leaving it at that.

But now the mission calls for video games, and for the first time in his life John holds a controller in his hands as he sits in the middle of a couch. He selects a game closely resembling Tetris. It's supposed to be easy. Anyone can do shapes.

Within five seconds his brick runs into the wall with pixelated blood covering the screen and an almost gleeful GAME OVER.]

Well that's a bit much.

WILDCARD

[Kind of taking it low key since I still have BASE logs going on. If there's something else you wanna do go for it or hmu with plotting!]

prose before bros.

[thingpuncher]

And Midnighter is right there, leaning over John's shoulder with some clean, fresh, filtered bottled water in his hand. He's clean in general, recently showered, hair slicked back, no longer covered in dirt and blood and bruises. Though he did get a nasty crick in his back after trying to fit into a shower capsule with another grown man. Those things are small as shit.

But whatever, he's just that much more in a good mood after killing an almost six month dry spell. He grins, sharp, but friendly. "Your reaction time is for shit."

i can dig it

[inconstantly]

"How is that supposed to be helpful?" With the game stopped for now John lifts his chin to look back at Midnighter, wrinkling his nose and tossing him a look of faux disdain.

"If I get eaten by a spider because I can't play a damn video game it's going to be your fault." Though the picture painted is grim, John is far from upset. He's in pretty high spirits himself even if he tends to play rough with words.

wildcard

[byfist]

[ Here she is, your Commanding Officer.

Firm, stiff-backed, waiting for a dance. Because it's one thing to train them with a little droid to follow them about. Her arms sit by her side and her gaze doesn't leave his face.

Another when she's standing all 6'4, one-eyed, weapons at her sides as was standard. No dress uniform for her, as ever, her straight black fatigues. She watches him go through motions and waits, carefully, as she eyes all the other recruits to perceive a particularly spectacular fuck up.

Then strides over, to stand before him. Waiting until after the droid pelts him with glitter before she moves. Gives him a moment to register it's her and then exactly as the duelling instruction prescribed but without warning, she strikes him. ]

Your performance offends me.

[ It, like the slap, isn't truly meant, there is no venom in her words. Merely, testing. Open palm, not hard enough to hurt but enough to sting.

His move now. ]

[inconstantly]

[John has never been face to face with his Commanding Officer before, but he doesn't need anyone to make an introduction. If he didn't expect to see her at all, then the slap is even more unexpected. As the tendrils of the sting make their way across his face, John smiles through the glitter. Sparkle covered lips part to display a grin filled with teeth.]

Didn't realize I captured your attention.

[This isn't how he usually plays, but who is he to deny a lady her kinks? He stands straight, arms behind his back, everything except the expression taking on the role of a soldier. No part of him is intimidated or offended, but he does want to see what happens next.]

If you do that again I might find it in me to try a little harder.

[byfist]

[ This had to be the most bemusing training she had ever done. Watching them fumble and play at fawning. Some better, some worse. But training it was -

- which left her to wonder, was this the face he would put up? It wouldn't be a bad one. Even if, - remembering his file so far as they had it - he shouldn't be half so smug.

Granted, none of it shows. Her face fixed, no smile nor anger on her expression. Oh, how the conditioning was marvellous for this kind of work. Her hand lifts, the glitter sticking to her palm, she dusts her hands off away from herself. ]

As you should, one of your kind should always seek to serve their betters.

[inconstantly]

My kind? Is this preparation for the spider hierarchy already?

[He'd gotten what he wanted of the slap, but John isn't finished. It isn't often the higher ranking officers make appearances like this and he is the curious sort. She's a person just like anyone else: someone with inner workings, their own curiosities, a tipping point. Habits of a con man have never fully left John and one of his first instincts in a situation is to get a read on his contact. The Commander might prove to be a challenge, but those were always the most fun.

John takes a step forward and extends a hand toward her, confident and playful.]

I'd learn better with a partner. Surely it's in the interest of COST that I do my best.

[byfist]

You've lost a limb so far. Go on.

[ It's an affected tone - she does not feel much, the Regency conditioning of all cloned soldiers made especially so - but she has been around a great deal of people who do feel things fully, let it seep it into their words, and she mimics them, now. But even so, it does come out that little forced, stilted in pauses to make sure she's got the tone right.

But the look is easier, glancing first to his eyes with her... one eye, then down, lower. To the ground and then jerks her head for him to move.

Have you been practising your bow, Constantine? She's waiting, and the threat of glitter ever looms. ]

[inconstantly]

If I have then it's the most pleasurable injury I've ever sustained.

[John maintains eye contact throughout his bow, looking up as Grothia towers over him. He's always kind of enjoyed being around people who are taller than he is, which isn't terribly difficult, and he has no ego to speak of concerning their noticeable height difference.

For the bow he slips into a role, that of a COST representative who belongs in the designated clothing, not a man far more comfortable in a half-buttoned dress shirt and underwear. His positioning remains properly stiff as instructed with the tuck of the leg and lift of the arm.

When he stands upright again no glitter comes. His hand then turns palm up if she truly does wish to take it for a dance. There's far less risk for more glitter if she doesn't.]

[byfist]

[ She watches him, watches his bow and he is rewarded for what it is worth, with a flicker at the corner of her mouth that might actually be a smile.

But it might be imagined because it's gone a moment later when she returns the bow. With more grace than someone who was so stiff and battle marred otherwise maybe deserves to be. Her arms left and sweep, her face stays up and looking at him and only him with her own visible eye.

Leaning on her back leg and she holds it the moment she needs to before she rises up to take his hand. Settling scarred and calloused fingers in his palm and curling around before she took the step to lead him out onto the makeshift dance floor. ]

Your preference to dance?

[inconstantly]

[He will take what compliments he can get, even if it's only the slightest bit of positive reinforcement from a barely there smile. John can read people. It's enough.

He walks with her to the dance floor, taking longer strides than usual to match Grothia's naturally long step.]

If it's just the two of us it might be easier to do the one that doesn't involve skipping about in a circle. The second one that was demonstrated I believe.

[Which was true, but also the skipping was just stupid. John covers her hand with a thumb as is custom with this particular dance.]

Whenever you're ready, Commander.

[byfist]

[ Why John, would you prefer a Volta? Just kidding that dance was never that exciting.

She nods, letting her fingers settle into his. Cool to the touch, she kept her hold light around his hand, feeling that exact pressure of his thumb like a weight. The contact was becoming easier, just as Chiron said it would, with time. Exposure. Like an infectious disease that you became immune to - were people like dreaded smallpox she saw in France?

Possibly.

But she nods, wetting her lip briefly as she looked up to count the music that was playing. The song that played that was soft, could easily lend itself to any of the dances. ]

As you wish.

[ She counts them in, a soft 1, 2, 3. Leaning back into the half step that swings as a pendulum, back and forth. ]

[inconstantly]

[If they could make it that exciting he would brave all the glitter COST has.

John keeps her hand in hers, leading Grothia with a self assured step. The back and forth step and kicking feels silly, but his previous life as a musician makes it easy to fall into a rhythm. As they begin the walk forward John looks to Grothia, making one eye contact with her rather than looking to his feet. He's only following instructions after all, focusing on one's partner looks self-assured rather than clumsy.

He gives her a crooked smile, making no effort to hide that he's enjoying present company.]

What does custom say regarding talking during a dance?

[byfist]

Encouraged.

[ a brief word, as she turns with him. He did in fact have a better sense of timing than most, to the beat of it - and that alone would get him far. So she's encouraging, rather than discouraging. Letting her steps skip with his. The click of her boots against the floor, the little quicker breath where the movements dictate it. To move with his sense of pace, as well as she could. ]

Gossip and lovers nothing's are often encouraged in such moments. I would advise being curious with the former and careful with that latter.

gaming

[heilt]

( he isn't the only one that is unfamiliar with much surrounding this mission. angela has known diplomacy for most of her adult life, being surrounded with all that overwatch had been involved in, but she'd always shied away from it herself, keeping in the background with her patients and science. she had a place and the public eye was not it.

it wasn't just the diplomacy that caused her to struggle. she hadn't tried the video games yet, and hadn't touched one in her life, but watching constantine play it now-- )

And to come from no violence.

( sigh. nowhere could be free from it )

[inconstantly]

Definitely didn't expect that from the shapes game.

[Then to add insult to injury, the training robot makes its way to John and coughs out a puff of glitter onto his knees and chest.

Right then. Could be worse.]

There's another one where a big yellow dot eats little white dots. Would you care to try it? Might be less violent.

[heilt]

How does it work?

( she at least comes further in the room, sitting beside him )

Maybe you should try it first so I can see what to do.

[inconstantly]

You must be joking. I've never played it.

[What is it about dying instantly that gives her any indication that he knows anything about video games?

Changing the game is the easy part. Then when it's time to start he has difficulty maneuvering, remaining stuck in a corner only to get eaten by a ghost.

He tosses the controller towards her.]

Yeah, I'm not going to be a very good teacher.

[heilt]

( his two seconds of practice are more experience than angela herself has, and she's thoroughly unprepared when he tosses the controller to her. at least she has the grace to try and mould it into a better situation )

Then we'll muddle through it together.

( because she's going to have one go and then pass it back to him. they both need to figure it out.

whilst angela does manage to get the game to start the controls feel very alien in her hands and she ends up dying before she can even start moving. how did you move this thing?

oh look. she's passing it back )

[inconstantly]

We'll we're a fine pair.

[He takes the controller but doesn't give it a second thought as he tosses it aside, withdrawing a pack of cigarettes from a pocket instead and tapping the box against a hand.]

Can't say we'd make the best of partners if this is the mission. Hopefully you know someone who is better at this.

[heilt]

No one that is here.

( unless genji harbored a secret skill. angela wasn't even certain that she knew anyone at home that was particularly talented either. though there were few people that she knew too well these days )

We'll have to find another way to impress them.

( or at least stay in good graces )